(no subject)

[benlehman]

In other news: Point out and criticizing the stupid things that men do to try to get sex is sexist against women.

I'm trying to wrap my head around this.

I've been in many games where the girl who the GM wants to get in bed, or already has in bed, gets special attention, "cool plot," etc. It's stupid boy behavior (never seen a girl GM do it) and one of the downsides to having one person with %100 of the social and material power in a gaming group. It's stupid and it happens constantly.

How is pointing it out an attack against the women involved? The only situation I can think of is one where a girl likes this behavior, and is afraid that acknowledging her privilege will take it away.

Comments

[mikegentry.livejournal.com]

After reading the article, I think what she's steamed about is not when it happens or when it's talked about, but when blame for it is reflexively placed on the woman. I.e., if you perceive that there is favoritism going on, and your first reaction, without knowing anything else about the situation, is to give the girl grief about it because your immediate assumption is that she likes it and/or is deliberately encouraging it, then that's a problem. And I tend to agree with that -- you really should first be going to the GM, or at least addressing it to both of them simultaneously, and preferably in a way that doesn't immediately assume that either of them are being deliberate or complicit about it. Because they may not be.

I also think she's steamed because she feels the first (non-ideal) reaction described is a lot more common than the second. I can't speak to this, because I've not seen it happen (much). But it doesn't sound like a particularly far-fetched guess.

And finally, I think she was too invested in being ranty and confrontational to communicate any of this well. She pretty much invited misunderstanding upon herself.

[benlehman.livejournal.com]

A "Here's a common dysfunctional behavior, here's how to handle it" post is an awesome thing.

This is more "Here's a common dysfunctional behavior, here's how some people have mishandled it, so let's just not bring it up at all." Which = lame.

yrs--
--Ben